Dear Darlin'
by Stephholby24
Summary: Basically, I got this idea when I read another Fan Fic which is similar to this one. In this fan fic, Jac and Jonny are writing letters to their little girl, from the moment that they both found out she was pregnant until the birth and possibly beyond!
1. Chapter 1

**Dear Darlin'**

**Chapter 1**

**Hi, so basically I got this idea when i was reading another fan fic, which was something similar to what im doing, but ive decided to write the letters from the beginning of the pregnancy up until she gives birth (Which Im pretty nervous about as its only a few weeks away D: ) and will talk about Jac and Jonny's relationship, arguements and everything else... hope you enjoy **

07.05.2013  
approxamatley 2 weeks pregnant  
(Only Human)

Dear 'foetus'

Well... where do I start, I guess I should start by introducing myself, Im Jac Naylor and I'm going to be your mummy really soon!

I've decided to keep this little book, so I can document everything whilst you are inside of me and one day we can look through it together, Me, you and your Daddy, Oh, by the way you're Daddy is a man (Well I wouldn't call him a man sometimes with the way he acts!) called Jonny Maconie, He's ever so loving and handsome and I'm sure he's going to be excited and Happy when Mummy tells him that you're going to be joining us soon!, I just need to find the right time to tell him, not just yet! But Mo (One of Daddy's and my friends) has told me that I need to tell him and soon.

To say I'm shocked would be an understatement as I was convinced that I could never have children, as I have a condition called, Endometriosis, which makes me really poorly every time i'm on! But as soon as Mr T (Mummy's gynaecologist) told me on the phone that I was pregnant, it took me a wee bit by surprise (As Daddy would say) but now come to think of it, I should have known that you were inside of me, as I was feeling sick, tired and generally under the weather!

Anyway I must go I'm due in theatre soon,  
Write soon  
Love Mummy xx

14.05.2013  
3 weeks pregnant (The More decieived)

Dear Foetus

Just A quick message as Mummy needs to vent some anger!

Mo has been on at me all day because I haven't yet told your Daddy that you will be with us in 27 weeks! She keeps dropping little hints to him whenever we are close but, unfortunately Daddy is not clever enough to pick up on them and click that I'm pregnant!

Anyway, I need to have a little word with you! What's with all these weird food cravings, today I've found myself snacking on chocolate covered with anchovies! It sounds disgusting but tastes so good! Mo caught me in the act earlier in the office and said that it's "A thousand kinds of wrong" in her words.

Ok, Ill speak to you later, I can hear Mo pacing up and down the corridor in search for me  
Love Mummy xx


	2. Chapter 2

**Dear Darlin'**

**Chapter 2**

**(Jac's Diary entry) **

21.05.2013  
4 weeks Pregnant (Divided We Fall)

Dear Foetus,

Today was the day your Daddy found out that you exist, Mummy didn't have the chance of telling him, Mo did that for her! There is a funny story behind this so I'll cut it short as I will be here for hours, So Mummy was in her office, updating patients notes, when Mo came in, asking if I had told your Daddy, when I said no because I thought that I had lost you as I have been bleeding slightly this morning, she came over and drew a silly picture of how I would look when you've grown bigger inside of my tummy, but I through it in the bin.

So when Mummy was in theatre, Daddy went into my office, to look for a number which I also threw in the bin (I wasn't in the best of moods today) he saw the picture, whilst Mo was standing by the doorway, watching him as he rummaged through my bin, it took him a while to click on that the picture was me with a bump, but he soon made his way down to theatre, where me and Sacha, (Mummy's best friend and Uncle Sacha to you!) where operating on an old lady, we were talking about his little girl, who's very poorly and me being me was having a rant about children and people who have children, when Daddy came racing in, we both had a chat and we did a special test and found out that you were still inside my tummy.

So that's the long winded story about how your Daddy found out about you, I'm sure we will find it funny one day, when your old enough to understand it. Anyway another thing that I found out today, I am a pretty good hairdresser, (Well I don't think i'll take it up as a career! I'll stick to being a surgeon!) I had to cut Uncle Sacha's hair, for his little girl who was scared of looking silly when her hair fell out due to her illness..

Anyway i'll write again soon,  
Love Mummy xx

P.S, I told Daddy about this book and showed him so expect some weird but meaningful messages

21.05.2013  
4 weeks pregnant

Dear Darlin'

Hello sweetheart, I'm going to be your Daddy! Me and you're Mummy are very excited to see you, I think you've just taken Mummy a bit by surprise, but she will grow used to the idea!

So today I found out that you're going to be joining our little family really soon, Mummy got a wee bit scared about telling me that you existed, but thanks to auntie Mo (Who you're gonna love!) for the drawing that funny picture of how Mummy will look when you're big and grown up in Mummy's tummy (By the way I have a feeling that Mummy may be having a few wee words with you when you're older about that!) that I found out that I was going to be you're Daddy.

I am so excited to meet you and to start buying you clothes and nappies and little things like that, I must admit I was a bit angry that Mummy didn't tell me that she's pregnant but after seeing how vulnerable and scared she was when we were in the ladies bathroom earlier, (Yes, I went in the ladies toilets, only to see for my own eyes that Mummy is pregnant) doing to test, that I understood why she was so frightened and scared about telling me so, I forgive her, just don't tell her!  
Anyway, I'm going to go, because I can hear Elliot and Mummy coming this way,

Write to you soon,

Lots of Love

Daddy xxx (Feels weird writing that!)


	3. Chapter 3

**Dear Darlin'**

**Chapter 3**

...

28.05.2013

5 weeks pregnant (Back from the dead)

Dear Our Little One,

Hello there, Mummy and Daddy here, (Yes we are getting along now!)

Today Daddy kept bossing Mummy around, telling her that she needs to take it easy, especially as you keep making her feel sick, (She's not to impressed about that). Im very eager to tell everyone about you But unfortunately mummy doesn't want to jinx it as its early days, so I will have to bite my tongue a little longer, only Mummy, Auntie Mo and I know about you at the moment, Oh and of course Mr T!

Anyway, moving away from all the droning on that Daddy is doing! Auntie Mo and Daddy organised a secret scan for Mummy, so we could see you for the first time, to make sure that your ok, as I was still bleeding a little bit, (Stop scaring me! And that's even before you've entered the world!), so Mo went on lookout, whilst Daddy did the scan, we were both so happy to see you, you already look like a tiny little person, wrapped up safely inside my womb, Daddy's got a picture, i'm sure he will be parading it around at your 18th birthday !

We both love you little one and we will write again soon

Love Mummy and Daddy xx

22.07.13

12 weeks pregnant- (Make or Break)

Dear Darlin'

Sorry that we haven't written in a while, we have been super busy just lately with all these sick people that need they're hearts mending, (If you ever need your heart mending back together Mummy, Auntie Mo and Granddad Elliot are your people!)

So today we get to see you again, this time you'll be a wee bit bigger, and will have different features that we couldn't see last time, well, We almost didn't get the chance of seeing you today, as where Mummy was going to have the scan done, they cancelled on her, but Daddy, being the clever man that I am, begged a midwife as we waited for our morning coffee, Which by the way Mummy is forcing me to stop having and I'm not a morning person at the best of times and need my coffee just to function, anyway, She finally let us have an appointment for this afternoon,

I cant wait to see you my precious,

See you soon,  
Love Daddy xx

22.07.13

(Make or Break) that afternoon

Dear our beautiful little baby,

We finally got to see you again this afternoon, after missing the appointment and me snarling at the snooty midwife, I'm surprised that we even got seen! But Daddy has a way with words and managed to persuade the snooty midwife to see us again (Woops)

We were so happy to see you again, you're alot bigger Now and don't i know about it, I now have a small bump to prove that you are inside of me, now that everyone knows!

Yes you heard right, Daddy decided to broadcast it to the whole ward, he grabbed their attention, whilst I was chatting to Granddad Elliot about a patient, Uncle Sacha, Auntie Mo and a few others were there, I have never been so mortified in my life, not about you my sweetheart, but at daddy putting me on the spot like that, Im not one for all the attention and eyes on me about my personal matters.

Anyway Ill chat soon my precious

Love Mummy xx

22.07.13

Dear little one,

It's Daddy again, Ahhhh I'm so happy and excited that I got to see you again today, you look perfect in every way and can't believe that you will be with us in a very short period of time!

As Mummy said earlier, I told everyone about you and they are so happy and excited to meet you!

I'll chat soon, Mummy wants to go home (Yes I get to sleep at Mummy's house tonight- I feel like a teenager!)

Love you lots wee one

Love Daddy xxxx


	4. Chapter 4

**Dear Darlin'**

**Chapter 4**

16.07.2013

13 weeks pregnant, (A Nights tale)

Dear my wee little baby,

Auntie Mo has had a bit of a difficult day! A little while ago, Aunty Mo did a very special thing for one of her friends who couldn't have babies, she carried her little boy, William, for 9 months and instantly fell in love, but had to give him to his biological mummy, called Sorcia, and today was his 1st birthday and it threw aunty Mo a little off her game today, so Daddy has been trying his best to cheer her up and keep her head in the game!.

I'm sure she will look forward to spoiling you for your first birthday (I don't know about aunty Mo but Mummy and Daddy will be spoiling your rotten!) in fact I think she may be more excited to meet you than Me!

Anyway I must go home to Mummy, I'm going to surprise her and make some tea!  
Love you lots little one  
Love Daddy xx

06.08.2013

15 weeks pregnant (Digby Dog)

Dear Bump,

I know there's been a lot of sad letters just recently, Daddy told me about Aunty Mo being a bit upset a couple of weeks ago, while I had a day off, but I can assure you that she is back to her bubbly self (Still nagging Mummy ! But I don't mind).

Well today, Granddad Elliot lost his little companion, his dog who was called Samson, he was accidently knocked down by a car in the hospital car park, apparently Granddad called for me to go down and help him, but I was busy in theatre mending those broken hearts, so he had him taken to the vets (They're the doctors for the animals) to make him better but, he had a condition that made his bones weak and brittle and had to be put to sleep.

So granddad was understandably upset and withdrawn so his girl friend, Sharon organised a doggy wake for him, which I kindly guided him in the right direction to attend, Mummy and Daddy walked in after our shift ended and sat with our friends from Darwin ward, (Where Mummy and Daddy work) and the other wards and had a good chat about the past and about Samson, so Granddad wasn't sad anymore.

And Daddy being Daddy, decided to make fun of Mummy because I can't eat peanuts whilst i'm pregnant with you, so he said, "Oh aye, you need to watch it now chunky!" don't you worry I will not let him forget it and will keep pestering him throughout the pregnancy, he just doesn't know this yet!

Right my sweetheart, Mummy's going to bed it's been a very long day, I'm sure Daddy will write in the morning

Love you lots,  
Mummy xx

20.08.2013

17 weeks pregnant (All at sea)

Dear Bump,

It's been a very long day! And Mummy and Daddy are hardly on speaking terms just lately, over stupid and mutual disagreements!

Anyway enough of our drama, Mummy went to Uncle Sacha's fund raising day for his little girls Cancer unit so she can get a bone marrow transplant, and we had to sit in teams, I was with Harry, Gemma and a few other nurses from other wards, (Daddy didn't turn up, he just went home in a grump) well to cut a long story short, cos Mummy could be here forever talking about uncle Sacha's dysfunctional relationship with Chrissie,

He and Chrissie split up a little while ago, and she was getting friendly with uncle Micheal at the fundraiser and Uncle Sacha got a little bit jealous, stopped the whole pub quiz style thing and walked over to see what they were doing as they looked a bit cosy, anyway things got a bit heated and Uncle Sacha punched Uncle Micheal in the nose because he said something silly, but Chrissie told him that they were talking about her having cancer, Mummy then stood up, holding Sacha back, (Shh don't tell daddy he would tell me off if he knew that I was caught up between a fight whilst I was carrying you).

Anyway I will explain when your older, can't wait to see you again in a couple of weeks,

Love you lots  
Mummy xx


	5. Chapter 5

**Dear Darlin'**

**Chapter 5**

27.08.2013

18 weeks pregnant (A good day for bad news)

Dear darlin'

Mummy and Daddy have been getting along just great recently, I think we are just to pig headed and stubborn to admit to each other what we really feel, anyway today Mummy and Daddy came in to work and met up with each other in the car park, Daddy told me off for coming in on my motor bike, saying it's about time they went away, because I'm gonna be an egg on legs soon, He's such a meany, Dont worry if he says anything nasty to you send him my way and ill sort him out!.

So Mummy, Daddy and Granddad Elliot had to work on this prisoner today, who had a broken heart, (Granddad fixes broken hearts too), but we didn't realise who he was at first but he soon filled us in, I think he took a shine to me aswell, but Daddy soon stepped in and told him that I was pregnant and would be on maternity leave pretty soon,

Anyway Granddad was a little bit distracted today, you remember me mentioning Sharon, the one i wrote about the other day, well she's been offered a job in America, where she comes from but wants granddad to go with her, he's not too sure saying he couldn't leave the hospital permanently so agreed to go on a holiday to America with her, but in the end he decided not to go, saying that he had to let her go, he loved her that much that he let her go!.

Daddy also gave me a lecture about how I shouldn't be riding my motorbike because I'm pregnant so he thought that it would be funny to throw my helmet away the tool.

Right i'm gonna go to the toilet for the millionth time today, please try and not sit on my bladder sweetheart  
Love Mummy xxx

28.08.2013

18 weeks pregnant (A good day for bad news)

Hello my wee baby,

Mummy had just ran out of the office in desperate need for the toilet, i'm guessing that your sitting on her bladder again, well done!

Anyway it's been a fun day today me and Mummy have been having a laugh and a joke together all day with Granddad, who was a bit sad as he wanted to be with Sharon in America, but decided to stay in England with us,

And what Mummy was saying about me having a go at her about the bike, I was only thinking about her and your safety as she already had a major accident on the bike 5 years ago and I don't think I could live with myself if anything happened to you or her.

Yes I did throw her helmet away, but again that's because I care about her and you, one day we will all be laughing at this when we tell you about all the things we did and the little things that we argued about.

Anyway im gonna go and meet Mummy as I have a feeling that she is gonna need a lift home

Talk soon sweetheart  
Love Daddy xx

03.09.2013

19 weeks pregnant (Point of Impact)

Dear bump,

Mummy and Daddy here, today we have been bantering between ourselves this morning as Daddy tried to prove Mummy wrong, when we asked Granddad for his opinion he just ignored us and went into his office,

Granddad was in a real mood today, we put it down to the recent death of his dog Samson two weeks ago, Daddy decided to try and console him by saying that he knew how he feels to lose a pet, but Daddy tried comparing the death of a budgie to a dog, lets just say that didn't work out very well,

So Mummy and Daddy tried coming up with different ways that we could make Granddad happy, but all we could come up with was karaoke and booze, which is pretty unfair, seeing as Mummy cannot drink.

So we had a patient's relative come in earlier and he brought his twins to the hospital with him, so Daddy assumed they were human because their names were Gary and Mark, but boy was he wrong, he was certainly in for a shock when he saw the two puppies in pink carry baskets.

Mummy couldn't help herself by laughing at Daddy, thinking it was funny, but then we tried to hide the dogs away from Granddad but they got to noisy, let say granddad didn't look to impressed, but soon come round to the idea when they were in his office, Mummy then being the smart brilliant person that she is came up with the theory that Gary the dog needs a home and granddad needs a dog, he says no, but to cut a long story short, granddad kept the dog in the end after Mummy had a heart to heart with him in the peace garden, This made Mummy and Daddy very happy.

Oh and Mummy found a baby grow that Daddy had bought for you, it had little robots on.

Speak soon our precious little baby,

We get to see you again next week nearly half way there,

Lots of love Mummy and Daddy xxxx

**Hi, I wont be updating until after Christmas now, but if i get any spare time i will,**

**Please read and review...**

**The next few diary entries are going to be difficult as they are the CDH diagnosis.**

**Have a good Christmas xxx**


	6. Chapter 6

**Dear Darlin'**

**Chapter 6**

10.09.2013

20 weeks pregnant, (The Kick Inside)  
The morning of the 20 week scan,

Morning sweetheart,

Today's the day Me and Daddy have been waiting for, to see how much you have grown in the past 8 weeks, we also find out whether you're a little girl or a little boy! I cant wait to find out and start buying you clothes in either pink or blue.

Anyway Mummy and Daddy haven't been getting on just recently, I suppose my constant mood changes and snarky comments have something to do with it, but we haven't been speaking much, I have asked him if he has half hour to spare whilst we go and see you but, he doesn't want me to use my 'Acid whit' at him anymore, this upset me a lot, so Mummy asked Auntie Mo if she could cover for me so I could go and see you, which she agreed to do.

Anyway moving away from the sad stuff, I'm counting down the hours until I go and see you again, I cant wait, I've been feeling you move around a lot just lately, it feels as though I have butterflies in my stomach, its such a strange feeling but it gives me a lot of comfort.

Anyway Mummy's due in theatre with Daddy and Auntie Mo, Ill write after the scan  
Love Mummy xx

10.09.2013

20 weeks pregnant (The Kick Inside)  
The morning of the 20 week scan

Dear Darlin'

As Mummy wrote a little while ago, It's her 20 week scan today, we get to see you again, well Mummy does, Me and Mummy haven't been getting along just lately, we keep disagreeing on little things, It's nothing to do with you sweetheart, we both love you very much!

I'm sure Mummy will give us a picture of the scan to keep, I love little things like this, little keep sakes, especially of you my precious. I can't wait to find out if your a wee girl or a wee boy, so we can start buying you clothes and toys. Im more excited than Mummy! Even auntie Mo can't wait!

Anyway only a short letter today, I've got to go into theatre with Mummy and Auntie Mo, Mending more broken hearts!

I promise i'll write later honey  
Love Daddy xxx

10.09.2013

20 weeks pregnant (The kick inside)  
After the 20 weeks scan

Hello again my precious baby,

Today I had My 20 weeks scan and found out that your poorly, you have what's called a Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia, it's where all your organ's in you're tummy slip through a tiny hole in your Diaphram and go into your chest cavity! I can't imagine what you're going through my precious little girl, My world fell apart when Mr T told me the news, It doesn't mean that ill love you any less my sweetheart, you are perfect to me and always will be!.

Mummy was just a bit thrown out of sorts I suppose, so I did what I do best, bottled it up and kept it to myself, not even telling Daddy, which was stupid of me, how could I not tell him that you're poorly, your his daughter to! I just couldn't bear to let the words leave my mouth, because then i knew that they were true, I knew that the news that your chances of survival are slim, 50/50 break me apart. Im in tears thinking about it now.

Mr T organised a MDT meeting to discuss your illness, to come up with the best plan of action, to make sure that you receive the best care when Mummy gives birth to you, Mummy finally told Daddy, after we met near theatre 1, Daddy was shouting at Mummy, saying that Im always busy, saying the meeting was more important than you, when I told him the meeting was about you, his face dropped, I could see his heart tearing apart as he learnt about the MDT meeting, all those thoughts rushing through his minds at the many things that could be wrong.

We then went to the meeting, sitting next to each other looking at the screen where your picture lay, perfect in our eyes, this is where Mummy told everyone that you are a little girl, our little girl. Daddy then mentioned a termination, Mummy was shocked when she heard this, How could he even think about aborting you, I wouldn't let him!.

When we left the meeting I went straight to the bathroom, to cool myself off, still shocked and shaken by the news, I even shed a tear at the thought of you being poorly, my precious little girl, why is this happening to you, if i could take this away from you I would in a heartbeat. Mummy and Daddy then sat in the locker room, having a talk about the diagnosis, I was still upset so got angry with Daddy even though he was trying to comfort and support me.

Anyway sweetheart I will always love you, I just hope I do you proud  
Love you always  
Mummy xxxxxxxxxxxx

10.09.2013

20 weeks pregnant (The kick inside)

Hello again my wee girl

Today didn't turn out how we had expected it to have, as Mummy said, we found out that you are poorly, A Diaphragmatic Hernia, words cannot describe how upset me and Mummy are about this, I don't know what I was thinking about when I suggested the termination, I guess I was angry and upset that Mummy didn't tell me sooner, but after talking to Mr T again, things look a lot clearer, I understand more about the condition and feel confident that you will pull through this, because you have a mother, called Jac Naylor, one of the strongest and most beautiful women I know!

I don't think Daddy is in the right state of Mind to be writing this letter at the moment, today has been awful, I feel guilty for shouting at Mummy, saying all those things that I did say to her keep running through my mind, showing no sign of escaping my head. When we were in that meeting all I could think about is how Mummy got through the scan, how she coped with having the news delivered to her on her own, how she must have felt when the words, Congenital diaphragmatic hernia left Mr T's lips, I wish I was there for her, I should have been there for her, to support her.

I know Mummy didn't mean any of those things that she said in the locker room, Daddy didn't mean to suggest a termination, I could never let Mummy go through with it my wee girl.

Daddy needs to go now and find Mummy, I don't want her to be alone

Sweet dreams my wee girl  
Love Daddy xxxxx


	7. Chapter 7

**Dear Darlin'**

**Chapter 7**

17.09.2013

21 weeks pregnant (Contra Mundum)  
Morning of 'termination'

Hello baby girl,

Mummy's been thinking a lot about what Daddy said last week, about the termination, maybe it would be for the best, I don't want you to suffer my precious little girl, Mummy couldn't handle it if I saw you in pain, or suffering and there was nothing that I could do about it, It's breaking my heart just thinking about it. Im so sorry, I love you so much, but it's for the best xx

So, Mummy had a chat with Mr T, Who has helped Mummy get an Appointment at the clinic, I haven't told Daddy yet, it's what he wanted so I guess it must be right.

Im so sorry baby girl  
Goodbye

I will always love you,  
Love forever,  
Mummy xxxx

17.09.2013

21 weeks pregnant (Contra Mundum)  
Morning of 'termination'

Hey my wee girl,

It's Daddy here, Mummy and Me have decided to keep separate books, as we are still not on speaking terms, we haven't spoken to each other since last week, since the CDH diagnosis, it's killing me to think that Mummy is trying to get through this upsetting time all by herself, aunty Mo has tried to talk to her, but she keeps shutting herself in her office, secretly crying to herself, I wish she would let me go in there and just give her a cuddle and never let her go, tell her everythings going to be ok!

I'm still kicking myself over what I suggested last week, how could I even contemplate Mummy having an abortion, what was I thinking, I could never lose you, I cant lose you baby girl, you and your Mummy are my world, even though we have silly fights and don't talk to each other for days we do love each other and we love you lots and always will

Ill write later my precious  
Love always, Daddy xxx

17.09.13

21 weeks pregnant (Contra Mundum)  
After the visit to the clinic

Hello sweetheart,

Mummy couldn't go through with it, I couldn't imagine my life without you being a part of it, with me, I got to the clinic and saw one of my old college peers, I wouldn't say I particularly liked her, she was stubborn and a snob. Well she began to talk about her perfect family with her perfect children, which made Mummy think, we may not be perfect but we can make this work, I can look after you and give you the care that you need for your illness, I will be there every step of the way baby girl, I will not let you down!

I don't know what I was thinking about when I agreed to book the termination, the look on Daddy's face when he walked in to my office this morning, the moment I told him about the termination, the moment his heart broke in to a million pieces as I spoke the words that I didn't want to say, It broke my heart seeing him like this!

When I got back from the clinic, Daddy was doing the ward rounds, clearly still upset with what I told him earlier, so I left him, not wanting to inflict anymore hurt onto him. But he eventually saw me and followed me into the locker room, His face filled with worry and concern, as I returned back to work after going to the clinic, he thought that I had gone through with it, But Mummy told him that you are still inside of me, I couldn't do it, I couldn't lose my baby.

Daddy then told me that he had spent the whole afternoon trying to call me, getting a taxi to the clinic to find me, leaving lots of voice messages telling me to stop, not to go through with the termination, but as he found the right place, the lady told him that I had already left the building, Daddy's heart broke a little more, thinking that he had lost you.

We had a long talk and went home, Mummy listened to the messages daddy left and they made me happy, saying that you will be strong because you have me as a mummy.

Im sorry I ever doubted you baby girl, I hope you can forgive me  
Love you forever and always  
Mummy xxxxxxxxx

17.09.2013

21 weeks pregnant (Contra Mundum)  
After the visit to the clinic

Hello My Wee Girl,

Today has been a bit of a whirlwind, Mummy told me this morning that she had booked a termination, because of what I mentioned last week, Why did I say that, she was vulnerable and weak, she didn't know what she was doing, the last thing she needed to hear was the word termination!

When Mummy told me this morning, my heart tore into a million pieces, my mind went into overdrive, thinking of things that I could say to stop her, I tried to tell her not to do it, when I was in the office but the words wouldn't come out, its as if someone removed my voice box so I couldn't get my point across.

So Daddy had been upset all day, aunty Mo has been trying to help me through it, trying to get me to talk about my feelings to her, So did Mr T, Mo set us up in the staff room, leaving us on our own so he could talk to me, But I wasn't having any of it, in fact I was quite rude to him, so after I've written this, I need to go and apologise to him. But eventually he got through to me, got me to admit my true feelings about the situation, dropping me little hints as to where Mummy was, leaving me business card in a book, safe to say I quickly dashed to the clinic, rushed around the many floors and confusing corridors trying to find out where Mummy was, I tried calling her but I think she was trying to ignore me, still angry at what I had said to her.

When I did find the clinic the lady told me that Mummy had already gone home, Daddy was shocked, it was like a bullet in the gut, it felt like the world had stopped and all my thoughts went crashing through my mind.

When I got back to the hospital, I went back to work like nothing had happened, trying to take my mind off of it, but when I saw Mummy talking to that nurse, I had to go and see her, see how she was. So I went to the locker room, where she went to get her stuff and Had a very long chat with her, she then told me that she couldn't go through with it, she couldn't face losing you she knew she could be a brilliant mum to you, but she hadn't listened to any of the messages that I left her but that doesn't surprise me, Im just happy that your still with us my baby girl, i couldn't imagine my life without you,

I love you always little girl, Im sorry about all the drama today, Mummy and Daddy promise not to do it again

Love you lots and lots,  
Daddy xxxxxxxx


	8. Chapter 8

**Dear Darlin'**  
**Chapter 8**

**24.09.13**  
**22 weeks pregnant (Fredrik)**

Dear my little girl,

Mummy here, me and Daddy have been getting on a lot Better over the past week, sometimes I don't know whether we are coming or going in this relationship, but let's just take it each day at a time shall we,

Well today has been eventful, not as eventful as last week mind you but along the same lines, anyway, mummy was getting annoyed at people talking about the events of the past couple of weeks it's still very raw and me and your Daddy are still trying to come to terms with it, and I caught Granddad Elliot and Aunty Mo talking about the CDH diagnosis, and I kind of flipped at them, I know they didn't mean it but as I said, it's still a very raw subject for us. Daddy then supported Mummy as I explained that you still have a 50 per cent chance of survival and good chance if you survive past birth, which I'm sure you will do my sweetheart, because if your anything like your Daddy, you will be determined to fight your way through this vicious condition.

Also as you know, Daddy has been pestering me to attend these baby classes, with other stuck up, snooty mums to be, (Not really my cup of tea if you ask me) and I've been telling him no for weeks now, even before the CDH diagnosis it's all he would go on about,

But today, as we were having a cup of tea in the staff room, when we were talking about you ad the realisation that you will be here with us really soon, he asked me again, we'll said that he had booked us in for one, but he could cancel if I wanted him to but I thought, why not I want to do things that normal parents do and if that means going to one of Daddy's stupid baby classes then that's it, we will go,

So we did, and just as I thought it was full of smug mums to be, waving their perfect baby scan photos around and comparing bumps and cravings to each other, me and your Daddy looked like spare parts as we stood their watching the conversations between them all, that was until Fleur came over to us! Oh god you think Aunty Mo's chirpy, well Fleur takes it to another level!

Highlights of the class we're definitely the flap jacks, embarrassing Daddy and leaving! Safe to say I will not be putting us both through that again baby girl.  
But Mummy did come out with some quite disturbing medical facts about the birthing process, I'm surprised I didn't scare myself!

Right I'm going to go now my precious, Daddy's waiting for me to hurry up!  
Love you more than anything

Love Mummy xxx

**24.09.13**  
**22 weeks pregnant (Fredrik)**

Hello there, wee one,

Daddy's just going to quickly write his version of events, as I think Mummy managed to cover the vast majority of it.

Yes Daddy did go on at Mummy to go to these baby classes, but I think that they are beneficial for us as new parents to be to build up a strong support network with other mums and dads to be, apparently Mummy has other ideas.

Yes Mummy did kind of lose it when she caught Granddad Elliot and Aunty Mo talking about the whole CDH thing, she is right it is still raw for us and we are trying to come to terms with it.

Yes, Mummy did embarrass Daddy at the baby class, basically calling me a sperm donor as we are not sleeping together, awkward moment that was my dear.

And I think mummy managed to scare the whole class about the birthing process, one of the perks of being a doctor I guess, but I reckon those mums to be pray to god that their baby doesn't get stuck in the birth canal !

Right now I'm late and Mummy is moaning as per  
See you soon princess

Love Daddy xxxxx


	9. Chapter 9

**Dear Darlin**  
**Chapter 9**

**08/10/13**  
**24 weeks pregnant (Like A Prayer)**  
**Dear Baby Girl,**

Sorry it's been a while since I last wrote, I've bee incredibly busy with work and it's worn me out, (being pregnant is also beginning to take its toll but let's not tell daddy that)

Anyway, me and Daddy are still on speaking terms, in fact I have finally given in to his pestering puppy dog eyes and allowed him to move in with him, he actually asked me to move in with him a while back but his flat is so tiny and there was no room for your stuff to go when you arrive, so he's moving in to Mummy's house. So I through him the keys earlier in my office, after we were looking at an article online and that was that.

So Mummy and Daddy were working together all day, and we had this man who was getting married to this gold digging blonde witch and a mother to match, they were awful, they were arguing over the trolley as he was brought out of the ambulance, spraying hair spray in Mine and Daddy's face (Don't ask, I will explain when your older) and just being darn right rude throughout their stay in the hospital. So mummy and daddy had to go and change our scrubs and Daddy went all gooey and soft on mummy when he caught a glimpse of my baby bump, it's not like I'm ashamed of you and were you lye but it really bugs me when people oooo and awww over my bump and want to touch it all the time.

The happiness didn't last too long though little one, one of Daddy's old friends from nursing college arrived on the ward from the agency we use, her name is Bonnie and they seemed to get on like a house on fire, so much so that Daddy forgot all about the keys that I gave him earlier and left them on my desk, walking off with 'Bonnie' at the end of shift, that's why I'm here, sitting in my office writing down my feelings to you, the only person that will ever understand what I'm going through, My daughter.

That's when things started to go down hill, Daddy broke Mummy's heart again, I should really be used to it by now but it still tears me apart every time i see him walk away from me.

Anyway baby girl, looks like it's just you and me now, Daddy's moved on with that 'Bonnie' women and won't care less about us no more, but I want you to know that I will always love you and nothing will change that, you are my life,

I love you lots and lots  
Love Mummy xxxxx

**08/10/13  
24 weeks pregnant (Like A Prayer)**

****Dear my wee girl,

Daddy has had a fantastic day, first Mummy asks me to move in with her, practically throwing her keys at me whilst we were in her office this morning, secondly one of my old nursing college friends turned up out of the blue on the ward as an agency nurse.

I thought I recognised her voice when I brushed past the staff room, and as soon as I saw that curly Afro style hair waving around as she laughed I knew it was her, it was that Bonnie Wallis that I knew from all those years ago. It's been great to have her around, catch up from old times and tell her all about you, and have a drink with here, the only reason why I left the keys on the desk because I feared that I would lose them, mummy should know what I'm like by now and how forgetful that I can get at times, but when in came back they were gone.

I don't know what's wrong with mummy today, she's been touchy and acting weird ever since I saw her perfectly rounded baby bump when were getting changed in the locker room after we were attacked by the bickering family of the mummy's boy we treated earlier. If I ever get like that with anyone that you love, please let me know not to harshly, let me know nicely and I'll stop, not promising that I'll like it because your my baby girl and I will always protect you.

Anyway Daddy's got to go, my head is pounding and I have auntie mo texting me,

I'll write soon baby girl,  
Daddy loves you  
Love Daddy xxxxxxx


	10. Chapter 10

**Dear Darlin'  
Chapter 10**

**22.10.13  
26 weeks pregnant (Friends like you)**

Dear my wee little girl,

I still can't quite believe that you will be joining us really soon, it probably won't hit me until you are actually here! I can't wait to see all your little fingers curled up to make a fist, all your tiny toes and little bits of hair, it's making me teary just thinking about it now.

Well, I have a funny story to tell you about grandad, he's just been given a new F1, called Zosia. I'm kinda getting the impression that he's bitten off more than he can chew with her! She's so much like Mummy, just the way she acts, she's so self driven and open minded it's uncanny! It's like they were separated at birth!

Me and Bonnie are still going strong, it's like we never left each other when we were at nursing college, obviously I still have feelings for Mummy, because of you we will always have that bond between us and we will do anything together for you! Just because we are not together doesn't mean we do not love you any less, you are our world.

Anyway, just a quick post today, I need to crack on with some work  
Love you lots, Baby Girl  
Love Daddy xx

...

**29.10.13  
27 weeks Pregnant (Flesh is weak)**

Hello Princess,

It's Daddy again, today has been a brilliant day, had lots of laughs with Aunty Mo, who is still looking on those silly dating sites for Mr Right, whatever that may be. Anyway some of the people she's bringing up are right idiots, half of them look like they've got dressed in the dark! But there was this one bloke, Joe I think his name was, who she really liked, I mean really really liked. Just to warn you, when your older and are interested in boys, they will have to get through me and your mum first, I won't settle for just anyone with my little girl.

Mummy also made me laugh today, even though we are not on talking terms, she shown an interest in the dating websites, saying something about how people big themselves up on them, when in reality they are nothing like they say they are, but quickly rectified herself, claiming that she wouldn't know as she's never been on one! Yeah right.

I got to admit, the shift did get a draining, especially when it came to the new F1 Zosia, who was being completely rude to grandad, not respecting him and his wishes one his ward, so I decided to show her his research project, that has taken him over 10 years to construct and perfect, I'm sure Mummy will fill you in more, I've always been rubbish with the technical side of things, but basically it's a robotic heart, does the same things as a human heart, just with the aid of a computer.

Well, that's your lesson over today on the human heart,  
I'll write later,

Love Daddy xxx

...

**29.10.13  
27 weeks pregnant (Flesh is weak)**

Dear my little girl,

What an exhausting day it has been, not only have I had to supervise another foetus in scrubs, who enjoys disrespecting her superiors, I've had to deal with your daddy's sniggering when I commented on the dating websites, I have not ever attempted to go on one and never will, I overheard someone saying that when they met someone off a website, they appeared shorter than they said they were, so ignore what Daddy says.

I understand that Daddy's having a difficult time with the F1, but I'm finding it amusing bossing her around and getting her to do things that I really don't want to do! It's like a have my own personal slave' I could get used to this. I sent her out on a little shopping trip earlier, as just recently I have had a craving for pickles from a deli in town and mint tea, (I haven't forgotten that I need a word with you about this young lady!).

She reminds me so much of myself when I was her age, intrigued into the workings of complex procedures and pieces of equipment and wanting to be in on everything, she's not one for surgery, she has made it clear that she does not want to specialise in surgery and is still adamant that she wants to become psyc, so it came to me as a bit of shock when she showed an interest in the Hertzig case that Elliot and Daddy were working on, I don't blame her for wanting to get involved, as she said, what would I do, I would have done what she did and went to the procedure. I have a feeling I'm going to grow to like Zosia, just don't tell her.

Oh before I forget I also set her a little task for after the surgery, to reconstruct a plastic skeleton from scratch, hilarious!

Mummy's going to go now princess,  
Write soon

Love Mummy xxx

...


	11. Chapter 11

**Dear Darlin'  
Chapter 11**

**05.11.13  
28 weeks pregnant (Last Dance)**

Hello Beautiful,

What a day I have had, I seem to be having quite a lot of stressful and draining days just lately,

Firstly I have had to deal with a posh, stuck up women who was admitted with chest pains, who has a fear of needles and who has been draining on all day about things I really couldn't care less about. Then I've had to deal with Bonnie, who has been acting more like a hypnotist rather than a nurse all day. There's something about her that really gets on my wick.

I know she was probably trying to mean well but I really do not need help especially from her, I'm really sorry to speak badly of your father but the sooner he realises that I do not want her help, I do not want to be her friend, the better. Fair enough, if they are together, obviously she will be involved in your life, much to my dismay. Another thing that really bugs me, is Daddy going around telling people like her about your CDH, it's none of her business, just mine, your Dad's and the other people involved in the case.

And as for Daddy joking around saying that I need a Sarcamectomy, was not funny.  
Rant over!

Anyway, you really need to stop wiggling around at the most inconvenient of times, it is rather uncomfortable and takes me by surprise and causing people to call me grouchy. This is where Bonnie tried to comfort me, which I was not best pleased about and Daddy tried to reassure her saying that she should go and check on bed 8 then coming to speak to me, fussing around, worrying if everything was ok because you moved.

I guess I'm just having a moody day.

I'm going to go before I find more things to rant about

Talk soon

Love Mummy xxx

...

**05.11.13  
28 weeks pregnant (Last Dance)**

Hello again my princess,

I don't know what's been up with mummy today, but she has been very rude towards Bonnie, sniggering and answering back whenever Bonnie suggested anything regarding the patient who was needle phobic. I don't know if it's her hormones or it's just normal Jac Naylor! Saying that mummy has been in a foul mood all day!

Bonnie even tried to comfort her earlier when you must have kicked her really hard, if you could see her face baby girl, you would understand.

I don't even know why Mummy was unkind to Bonnie, all she was doing was trying to help her and make the case easier for her cos she knows she has a short fuse and her hormones are all over the place.

I told Bonnie about your condition, the CDH, she was ever so supportive and kind about it, offering me to talk to her when needed, this is why I love her, if it would have been mummy, she wouldn't even want to know.  
This is what your mummy's like, doesn't like to think ahead, doesn't show emotion towards anything. She emotionless, only caring for number 1

Don't you worry my wee girl, Daddy will love you whatever you choose to do in life.  
I'm not saying mummy won't love you but she doesn't like to show emotion in front of anyone.

I'll chat later baby,

Love Daddy xxxx

...

**26.11.13  
31 weeks pregnant  
(Sink or swim)**

Hello wee one,

Mummy's not been in work today, I think she's had to attend a meeting or something like that.

Anyway, Daddy and Bonnie played a joke on the F1 Zosia, it was hilarious, we decided that she needed learning a lesson in how to approach people and take a joke and that's were we came in.

Well, the one joke that really got us was when I pretended to be someone else on the phone, it's Grandads 25th medical birthday and we all chipped in and got him a present, a strimmer for his garden, but we told her we booked a stripper, (I will explain when you are old enough!) obviously she was a bit taken a back and thought we were being serious, so Daddy and Bonnie hid in the nurses office area and called the ward from an unknown number, she answered and thought we were the stripper company confirming the booking.

Her face was a picture.

Then later in the shift, she approached Elliot about his apparent ways of life and he was oblivious and slightly offended at what she said, me and Bonnie couldn't help ourselves but laugh!

I'll speak soon baby girl, me and Bonnie are off out tonight

Love you lots,  
Daddy xxx


End file.
